tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1742606127352029741.post4847432072582009587..comments2023-09-17T04:55:11.069-04:00Comments on Not I but Christ: ReciprocityMaly from Calihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07719312303776337302noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1742606127352029741.post-63360347698198254802008-09-17T01:14:00.000-04:002008-09-17T01:14:00.000-04:00In my circle of friends, there are some people who...In my circle of friends, there are some people who like to share everything. Then there are others who like to keep things to themselves. Sometimes I feel that even though some people share so much about themselves (like their sex lives for example), I do not want to share as much as they shared with them because it makes me feel uncomfortable, kind of how professor cyborg's example made her feel.<BR/><BR/>I usually do not want to share more than the other person does, because I feel like either they think I am strange or that they think I am going on and on and that I shouldn't be disclosing as much as I am. <BR/><BR/>One example where I have found the principle of reciprocity to be very common is in dating situations. I find that when a couple is initially getting to know each other, they disclose and reveal information to each other in similar manners in terms of how much they reveal. If both feel comfortable, they might start talking for hours and telling each other their life stories on the first date. However, when one person reveals a lot and the other person feels like they have crossed a boundary, things then tend to go downhill from there. <BR/><BR/>I really like this principle of reciprocity because I believe it varies in different situations. Sometimes when you get really comfortable with the other person (ie your significant other or your immediate family) you may violate the norms of reciprocity. However, in most social situations, crossing that boundary isn't a good thing.Rina Sutariahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17528839621115147888noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1742606127352029741.post-74730214042784701712008-09-17T01:12:00.000-04:002008-09-17T01:12:00.000-04:00This comment has been removed by the author.Rina Sutariahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17528839621115147888noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1742606127352029741.post-73760507590354709412008-09-16T20:35:00.000-04:002008-09-16T20:35:00.000-04:00Yes, I can definitely agree on the reciprocity con...Yes, I can definitely agree on the reciprocity concept, especially when it comes to self-disclosure. For whatever reasons, it seems we almost feel obligated to share information when someone shares something with us. I've noticed that. But I definitely knows what it feels like when you share information, and you feel like you are on that awkard limb all by yourself when you don't get much back. That's when I realize that sometimes I divulge too much information! ;)COMM Aficionadohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15494084332419394333noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1742606127352029741.post-80364577506467183902008-09-16T20:29:00.000-04:002008-09-16T20:29:00.000-04:00The idea of reciprocity is certainly evident in th...The idea of reciprocity is certainly evident in the dominant U.S. culture. I'm not sure of the degree to which it's found across cultures. As you point out, people generally feel uncomfortable when others violate the norm of reciprocity, especially when they disclose too much. When I was an undergraduate (in the 1970s) I had a professor for a class called In Pursuit of Awareness. Students were expected to self disclose to some extent. But when the professor said, "I really like this trend of women not wearing bras, especially among students," I was taken aback. For me it was a norm violation of the professor-student relationship. And I definitely wore a bra to his class after that.Professor Cyborghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07168648567289103892noreply@blogger.com