Take the hardships and endure them as discipline. Take the discipline as training to "strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees...then you shall no longer be disabled, but rather healed." Hebrews 12:12-13
Our "human fathers disciplined us and we respected them for it." Hebrews 12:9
My grandpa and step-dad always had these underlying lessons in everything they shared with me. I respected them for it. There was always some nugget of wisdom or knowledge in every little thing, but I see it as such a gift now. "Do not make light of the Lord's discipline, do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines those He loves." Hebrews 12:5-6
He disciplines the ones He loves. The coach and teacher push the one they see the most potential in, pushing and challenging for maximum growth. The lessons hurt, but they only hurt temporarily...it is for long term benefit. See passed the "right now. "Later on however it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." (v. 11) Look for the lesson in the pain. The catalyst Pain is the teacher, God' mega-phone. Be strengthened then by grace. Submit to the Father of our spirits and live! (v.9)
Don't shrink away, lose heart, have self-pity or be a victim. Press on, endure, persevere, obey, grow, You are a survivor. The opposite of control is growth. You are more than a conquerer! Obedient endurance.